Find Me On Substack

Hey friend! 

Just wanted to drop a note here that I have officially started a Substack (like every other blogger you've followed). I'm still learning the formatting and getting into a groove, but I've been feeling inspired to write again and am excited to see where it goes.

You can find it HERE and I would be so grateful if you subscribed. 

I haven't decided what I'll do with this space yet. I have so many fond memories here and don't want to completely dissolve it just yet. 

Thanks for being a part of my writing journey.

Peace,
Sarah

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Dorothy’s Birth Story

Dorothy Emmanuelle

Our girl is here!  

I started a draft of Dorothy's birth story when she was a month old and could not formulate words to get the experience down "on paper" (typed out), so here we are months later and I am finally crossing the to-do off my list.

Much like her big brother, baby girl was super cozy and did not want to arrive on her due date, December 14th. A week over and she was still not budging. I had zero signs of labor and Christmas was days away. Thankfully, I was able to arrange with my doctor to delay the typical timing of induction (41 weeks) so that I wasn't guaranteed to be in the hospital on Christmas. Had she come on her own, I would have been perfectly fine with Christmas away from home, but I didn't want to schedule it. 

For the record, my OB was super reasonable with the delay of my induction. All she asked was that I have an extra ultrasound to check fluid levels around our girl at the 41 week mark. Our levels were great, so we were good to go pushing the induction to the evening of December 26th.

After a phone call on Christmas Eve and some shuffling of schedules, we were able to move from an evening induction to a 9am appointment and I was thrilled. We got to the hospital 10 minutes late (#secondchild lol) and were checked in shortly after and taken to an actual room, not triage! (See Matthew's birth story for why that was so exciting to me.) The nurses got me checked in and set up for an IV if necessary. The doctor came to check my progress and I was at a zero for everything which wasn't super surprising since I hadn't had any signs of labor, but was still discouraging because we were at nearly 42 weeks pregnant and I hadn't dilated at all. 

Almost a week before the induction I developed a very painful rash on my lower back that all of the nurses and doctors that saw me assume was shingles. (Cute, right?) Because of the rash, they had the anesthesiologist come by to see if it would affect their ability or plan for an epidural if I decided to get one (the plan was to try for an unmedicated birth). Luckily, it was not in the way of anything, but they did put a big clear bandaid over it to be safe, and that oddly relieved some of the pain which was a bonus. 

At 11 am they had me on my first dose of Cytotec (vaginally). After three hours I had started some easy contractions (maybe a 2 on the pain scale), but there was still no change in progress, so they began the second dose and the discussion of the Foley catheter was introduced. I had already mentioned to my nurse that I really did not want to have one since it was such a painful experience with Matthew. I’ve heard the pain from them ranges from person to person, which must be true because I have friends who barely noticed theirs and others who, like me, found them to be the most painful part of childbirth. My nurse (I wish I remembered her name because she was incredible) helped communicate that with the doctor and I did not feel nearly as much pressure to jump to that intervention as I did from the doctor who delivered Matthew. 

They checked my progress after the second dose was completed at around 5:30 pm and I was only about 1 cm dilated which was discouraging. The doctor mentioned the Foley again and I asked to try one more dose of Cytotec. After she'd inserted it and left, I turned to Michael and told him there was no way we were having our baby today. I think baby girl may have heard me and said, "challenge accepted," because boy did things change with that third dose. 

With Cytotec you aren't allowed to move around for the first hour, which was not an issue the first two doses because the contractions were so manageable. This time, however, they started to get stronger and it was challenging to stay still with my legs elevated and work through them. They went from about a 2/3 on the pain scale to a 7/8 very quickly.

At 6:30 pm, the nurse switched me to a cordless monitor so I could move around a little easier. I asked for a birthing ball to work through some of the more intense contractions. After a bit of searching, they found one that was just a tad too small for my height, but I decided to try to make it work. After a few contractions, I still wasn't feeling comfortable, so I decided to ditch the ball. I stood up and instantly peed everywhere! Or at least, I thought I did. We placed a call for the nurse to let them know I'd had an accident and when she arrived she let me know I had not peed, but my water broke! To be fair, they manually broke my water with Matthew and I'd already had an epidural, so I had no idea what to expect and the floor had a warm varnish, so the liquid looked yellow. We all had a good laugh. 

Contractions at that point were still very intense, and I thought I was still barely dilated, so I asked to have my progressed checked. The doctor came by around 7:30 and I was at 5cm! 4cm in around 2 hours which was crazy fast compared to Matthew. 

I was so glad to see progress, but again, my only context for labor was with Matthew, and when I reached 5cm with him I had 5 more hours of labor. With that in mind, I asked for the anesthesiologist to come for the epidural because 5 hours of contractions at that intensity would have been miserable. 

My nurse must have had a better sense of how quickly things were progressing because she had the team come asap and there was a sense of urgency in the room while they did the procedure (though that may have been because it was hard to sit still through it all). 

The team left and maybe 20 minutes later I told the nurse I thought I was getting close to go-time. She told me to let her know when I needed to push, and I asked how I would know (they told me with Matthew), and she said, "oh, you will know". 

Sure enough, maybe 2 minutes later I, I knew. 

The delivery team quickly arrived as I was starting to push. Delivery was way more painful this time. I wonder if maybe the epidural didn't fully go into effect or if I didn't notice as much with Matthew because of how painful the Foley was for me. But even though it felt like ages, I only had to push a few minutes (through about 1.5 contractions) before our sweet girl was born at 8:35pm. 

Four months later, I am still in shock with how different this labor and delivery experience went. It was less than 12 hours from the time we arrived at the hospital to getting to hold our girl and I went from 1cm dilated to 10cm in 3 hours. 

Things went so much faster (and smoother) this time around and the whole experience really confirmed my suspicion that the few things about Matthew's birth that were off had to do with the newness COVID - not that it didn't have a role in this birth. Half of the mom's on our floor tested positive so masks were understandably required as the staff frequented each room. (Apparently I only have babies during peaks in the pandemic.)

We brought our girl home on December 28 and she’s been getting loved on by her big brother ever since.

Peace,
Sarah

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What I Read in January 2022

At the beginning of 2021, I decided to share the books I read (mostly listened to) on my Instagram via stories. At the end of each month, I would post a picture of the cover of the book and include a (very) subjective star rating for the title. I had been using Goodreads for a few years and often gathered new tbr (to-be-read) titles via books I saw shared on other accounts, so I thought it would be fun to share my own reading journey. 

And it was! 

I got so much positive feedback, and by the end of the year, I had many friends reach out to say that they hoped I would continue sharing in 2022. Thankful for the encouragement (and assurance that it wasn't annoying), I am happily continuing to share. 

This year I'm hoping to document a little more of the process. Y'all know how to Google a summary, so  I won't dive too much into plots, but I will share short thoughts of my own. I don't have a definitive plan of what this will look like and I am sure it will evolve with time, but for now, they'll be short and sweet like those I shared in my 2016 Summer Reads recap way back when. 

1. Under the Whispering Door by T.J. Klune

I wasn't entirely sure what to expect with this one, but had heard a brief synopsis on a podcast and thought it sounded interesting. I knew it dealt with the concept of what happens after you die, but I imagined it would similar to The Midnight Library and was pleasantly surprised at the unique construction of a limbo-esque tea shop that the author wove together. The main character, Wallace, is absolutely annoying and predictable, but not in a way that has you wanting to throw the book against the wall (or your phone if you listen to the audiobook like I did). The tea shop owner, Hugo, is charming and the other characters are lovely too. Overall, I really enjoyed it and am patiently waiting for my turn with House in the Cerulean Sea which I put on hold at the library immediately after I finished.

2) Barking to the Choir by Gregory Boyle

I absolutely love Father Greg Boyle and the amazing work Homeboy Industries does with formerly gang-involved and previously incarcerated people. If you haven't read Tattoos on the Heart, I would recommend beginning there. This is his second book, which I had heard wasn't as good, but I still very much enjoyed it. At the beginning, Fr Greg makes a note of someone commenting that he shares the same stories a lot when he speaks. This is true. I recognized multiple in this book, but that did not make it any less enjoyable. One story, in particular, touched my heart even more while reading this book than when I had originally heard him share it at a conference years ago. His most recent book, The Whole Language: The Power of Extravagant Tenderness, is sitting on my nightstand and was the impetus for me finally getting making time to dive into Barking to the Choir.  

3) All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr

This has been on my "to-read" list for ages and came highly recommended by many friends. Set in France during WWII, I thought it had a unique storyline and beautiful character development. There were moments when I did not understand changes in time or which character's view we were reading about at the moment, but that could have been because I was listening to it and did not have signals that may have been included in book pages. 

4) The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

This also came recommended by a friend whose reading list matched much of mine last year. I read Malibu Rising by the same author and very much enjoyed it, so I was excited to give Evelyn a try. The premise of the book is a journalist getting the opportunity to write the memoir of a highly elusive movie star and the book hops back and forth from the meetings they share in present-day to the stories of the star's past. There were pieces of the plot I found predictable, but I was very impressed with a surprise at the end that I did not see coming and I absolutely LOVE when that happens. 

5) Just Haven't Met You Yet by Sophie Cousens

A sweet book that centers around the main character searching for the man with whom she accidentally swapped luggage at the airport. I found it very enjoyable and thought its plot was a nice balance of unique, yet predictable which is really all you can ask for in a rom-com. 

6) Pride by Ibi Zoboi

This is a fun reimagining of Pride and Prejudice set in modern-day New York City. I know not everyone likes adaptations of classic works like this, but I have always been a fan of them when well done. I will add the caveat that I have never actually read Pride and Prejudice (Don't hate me! It's on my list!), so my declaring it is a well done adaptation could be refuted by a true Jane Austin junkie. 

7) Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone by Brene Brown

This book articulated many thoughts I've had regarding our increasing polarization and included actual research to back up things I couldn't even form words around. I've heard Brene Brown speak on podcasts and seen a few YouTube videos with her, but I don't know if I've ever fully read one of her books and am so glad to have listened to this one. 

8) A Slice of Heaven (The Sweet Magnolias #2) by Sherryl Woods

I watched the Netflix series Sweet Magnolias and found it enjoyable. Nothing earthshattering, but I liked it enough to pick up the book. I read the first book in the series last year and with the upcoming release of season two, decided to try the second book. Book #2 was similarly fine/good enough to read the next book, but book #3 (my 11th read of the month) left something to be desired and had some serious plot issues - even for chick lit. I suppose it makes sense why #3 had no waiting time on the Libby app. #4 doesn't either, and I'm still so disappointed with the last one that I don't know if I even want to continue with the series...

9) The Ministry of Ordinary Places: Waking Up to God's Goodness Around You by Shannan Martin

A friend shared this on Instagram earlier this month and I am so glad she did. The book wasn't available at my library, so I used an Audible credit to purchase it and there's a good chance I will end up getting the hard copy too just because I want to underline, highlight, and sit with some of the wisdom the author shared. I think the best way to summarize the book is with a quote by Mother Teresa that the author references in the text: "The problem with the world is that we draw the circle of our family too small."

10) When You Get the Chance by Emma Lord

A YA novel about a Broadway-obsessed high schooler named Millie who "pulls a Mama Mia" or rather, a "Millie-Mia". I read You Have a Match by Lord last year and enjoyed it which led to picking this one up and I am so happy I did. It was delightful. 

11) Feels Like Family (The Sweet Magnolias #3) by Sherryl Woods

I was not a fan of this one. See book 8 above. 

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And there you have it. The first bunch of reads for the year. I was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed the bulk of them and I look forward to seeing what the rest of the year brings in terms of books. 

What about you, friend? What are you reading?

Peace,

Sarah

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4 Rules for Seasonal Decorating

I read a new (to me) quote on Instagram last week that said, "in autumn the trees teach us how beautiful it can be to let things go" and I am hoping to bring that mindset into this particular season of my own life as my family and I gear up for some new transitions and new rhythms as a soon-to-be family of four.

Like just about every other person out there, I love fall. I love the crisp air, the changing leaves, the spicy scents and tastes, and just about everything this season has to offer.

That includes decorating inside and outside with ALL of the pumpkins and other autumnal goodies. 

I've gathered quite the collection of fall decor over the years and try to follow a few rules when it comes to shopping for fall (or any seasonal) decor that I thought I would share with you:

1) Only buy a few pieces at a time.

I know it can be tempting to knock everything out in one swoop, especially if you are decorating a new home, but you don't have to go full out your first year of decorating and with fall, a little can go a long way. 

Instead of buying all the trendy pumpkins from this season, find 2 or 3 things you really love and are sure you can use again with your room designs. Not only does it save you money each year, but it ensures there is space for new items if you see something you absolutely adore instead of bringing something new home and having no place left to display it. 

2) The dollar section is your friend.

Because seasonal decor can go through trends, be sure to check out the dollar sections or cheaper decor sections in stores when you're shopping. So many of my fall decorations came from Target's dollar spot and I've been able to decorate multiple rooms with various trends that match their decor. Last year's black and white gingham pumpkin trend looks amazing in our kitchen, and the muted cool tones from this year's mini pumpkins look adorable in our family room. 

3) Find things that can be used across seasons and holidays.

Instead of buying a lot of Halloween themed jack-o-lanterns, try buying more autumnal pumpkins that make sense to have on display for more than just October. Similarly, see if there is any fall home decor that can cross into other seasons - like a welcome mat that references cooler weather (oh hey fall and winter) or a floral arrangement that has warm tones, but does not scream "autumn" and will look great on your end table year-round (see below for the one from Target last year that I use all year). 

4) Wait to shop until the end-of-season sales.

You read that right. That vast majority of my fall (and Christmas) decorations are purchased right around the time that they can't be used anymore and saved for the following year. It seems counter-intuitive, but with end-of-season clearance deals that cut prices up to 70%, you really can't beat the savings a little bit of patience can afford you. 

That is not to say that I don't purchase any new items when certain stores erect gorgeous displays of pumpkiny goodness (I'm looking at you, Target). But I do try to limit how much I spend and what I choose to purchase at full price. 

What I bought this year:

This year I splurged and bought this beautiful fall wreath from Hearth and Hand. (The only reason I did not wait for this to go on sale is a previous experience with a beautiful magnolia wreath that sold out and was never restocked.) I love that it is not specific to a certain holiday and can be used for long stretches of time year after year. Its simplicity also allows it to be dressed up for special occasions. 

I also purchased a new welcome mat and layering rug that can both be used for fall and winter. I hadn't updated ours in years and our old welcome mat is barely legible. (Speaking of, does anyone know what type of paint would be good to use to refurbish an old one?)

Admittedly, those three purchases already put me over my usual decor budget, which is something I will keep in mind for next year and upcoming holidays. 

My final purchases are more budget-friendly and the types of things I usually buy early in the season. A woven cattail leaf pumpkin, warm cider and cinnamon pumpkin candle and three small pumpkins from the dollar section. $13 total and easily incorporated into our home. 

Other than the mums and pumpkins from Trader Joe's and a local nursery, everything else displayed around our house has been collected through the years, mostly from TJMaxx/Marshalls/HomeGoods, Hobby Lobby, and (you guessed it) Target. 

My son broke one of the ceramic pumpkins I've had for years within four days of it being displayed. Luckily it was a clean break that I was able to super glue, but it was a clearance find at TJMaxx for $6 and not the end of the world. My cat broke a smaller $3 pumpkin from Hobby Lobby a few years back. It's missing a small piece but still gets used with the broken part turned toward the wall.

Moving homes has also made certain decorations not work as well in the space and I don't feel nearly as bad packing away the few items we didn't have a spot for this year as I would have if I'd spent a lot of money on them. (It's less than $10 worth of things.)

Decorating our home is one of my favorite things to do. I love the sense of newness and excitement transitioning from one season to another can bring and I am always so grateful when others notice the time and care we put into our home. I hope the rules I shared help you with your seasonal decorating and I can't wait to see the fun finds you grab this year for fall and (sooner than you think) winter.

Peace,
Sarah

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And Hay Became Holy: Advent 2021

 I still haven't been as active as I'd like on this little corner of the internet. August and September were incredibly full in many ways - some good, some bad. Posts I had been planning involved home projects that did not get done and the time and headspace to think of and create others evaporated. The gears are starting to turn again though, so we'll see what's in store before baby Rose arrives in Dec. . .

Something exciting I did want to share here is an Advent Devotional I had the privilege of writing for. It's a project I've been keeping secret for almost a year and I cannot wait to see how it blesses the women who pray with it in the coming season.  

For those who aren't familiar, Blessed is She is an online, Catholic women's ministry centered in prayer and community. I've been a devotional writer with the team since 2017 and have been blessed by so many friendships made within the team and with women I've met through the ministry.

Each year BIS releases an Advent and Lenten Devotional to help women enter more deeply into the liturgical seasons. The themes and writers change each time and this year's book is called "And Hay Became Holy" and invites readers to enter into the manger and pray with each "character" in the nativity. 

I wrote reflections for the first week and was assigned the ox and donkey, who have come to be two very important figures in my personal prayer since first encountering them last November. (I've been wanting to write about that experience for a year now and am excited to finally flesh it out now that the devotional has been released.)

This year's devotional includes gorgeous images to pray with using "visio divina" along with the typical scripture and writer reflections. 

You can learn more about the devotional and other Advent products like the fun bundle options (that always sell out) HERE.

Thank you so much for using my affiliate links and sharing it with others as it helps to support our sweet, growing family. 

I can't wait to pray with you! 

Peace,
Sarah

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It's been a while . . .

 3 posts. That's all that I managed to create last year - at least in this space.

In reality, the past year contained a plethora of creating and learning and growing and just being. The being is my favorite. True, the lockdowns and social restrictions were challenging and just plain hard, but they also created a space of pause and of intentionality between me and my little family, and for that I am grateful.

It seems like yesterday we were navigating the newborn life with Matthew, and in less than 20 weeks we'll be entering that space once again with his sweet baby sister. (I think most of you follow me on Instagram, but if not, surprise! We're pregnant!)

Michael and I were talking last night about how crazy those first weeks with Matty were. How we were able to survive on so little sleep and feel similar (but also very different) tiredness now that our toddler finally sleeps through the night (mostly). 

I overheard a friend share with another woman who was nervous about the birth of her newest babe that God gives you the grace to parent three kids when you have the third kid. Because that's when you need it. 

This will only be the second babe we get to hold in our arms, but I imagine the same notion is applicable here. We probably aren't completely prepped to care for a toddler and newborn, but we will be as soon as she's in our arms. Because that's when we need to be. 

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I've been feeling the pull to write again lately. Not about anything specific, and I don't have some magnificent plan to beautifully resurrect the blog, but I'm leaning into this urge to create and hope to see some good that comes from it. 

So I guess I'm back (sort of). For now, when I need to be. And if you happen to be reading along or have randomly stumbled into this space, thank you - for being here, for being you, and for taking the time to wander through the randomness that is this post, and likely will be this blog. 

Talk to you soon, friends. 

Love,
Sarah

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Our "Breastfeeding" Journey

It’s World Breastfeeding Week (or Month, depending on what post you see). This is also the month that I have chosen to stop nursing (exclusively pumping / combo feeding) Matthew and I thought I would share a bit about our breastfeeding journey on the off chance that it might bring comfort to another new mama out there with a similar experience while she discerns what’s best for her family.

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Let me preface this with the following: I was formula fed. I was also raised by parents who worked full time outside of the home, went to public school, and was delivered via cesarean (including an epidural). And I turned out fine.

There is no “right” way to raise your baby. As long as you are loving on that sweet child, you are doing what’s best.

These seem like ridiculous statements to have to make, but I know a lot of women who’ve been criticized for the way they choose to raise their kiddos. A friend of mine was stopped by a stranger in the grocery store while buying formula and told that breast is best. Another friend’s sister was criticized by her doctor for choosing not to breastfeed. The comments I hear from people who assume I went to private school about public school education are laughable. And the level of superiority some people feel for birthing vaginally – especially if they did it un-medicated – is sad.

And I know that because of a lot of these stories, I have found myself personally defensive about my choices in parenting and have even felt like a failure – and I’m only four months in!

So, I want to be clear. This is simply my experience. It’s not meant to be a “this is the right way to do it” post. My story may parallel yours, it may not. You may relate to some of my feelings about nursing, and you may not. Either way, that’s fine.

The main reason I’m writing this all down is because the biggest comfort I’ve felt in my parenting journey so far, is friends sharing they’ve had similar experiences. 

When I announced I was being induced, I was shocked at the number of friends who shared positive induction experiences. And when I shared my difficulties breastfeeding, I was similarly met with the solidarity of women I love, some that were right there in the thick of it with me. In fact, when I was deciding whether or not to stop nursing, it was a post from a friend articulating similar feelings that, in a sense, gave me permission to follow my instincts and set an end date.

My hope is that this post might offer some of that same sense of solidarity I’ve been blessed with. Our mothering journeys may be eerily similar or radically different, but in the end, we are mamas aiming to do what is best for our sweet babies. And that’s really all we need to worry about.

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